Worst team of all time defeats mighty Red Wings

On By mpetrella
Even Ironhide is getting tired of this shit

FINAL SCORE (Hi Dad!)
Oilers 3-2, in a shootout.

H2H DONATIONS TALLY
Beanie :: $20 :: She had to bow out early, and generously gave another twenty.
Mike S. :: $10 :: $5/goal
Rob M. :: $6 :: $2/goal + $2/Defenseman goal below the faceoff dot
Sara S. :: $5/Datsyukian mention
Sara N. :: $4 :: $2/goal
Drew :: $4 :: $2/goal
Jenn :: $4 :: $2/goal
Brad B. :: $4 :: $2/goal
SigSeg :: $4 :: $2/goal
J.J. :: $4 :: $2/goal
CaptNorris :: $2.20/Lebda scratch
Ben G. :: $1.30/Datsyuk point
The Production Line :: $4 :: $2/goal
TPL Dad’s 10% :: $7.25
TOTAL PLEDGED VS. EDMONTON :: $79.75
TOTAL RAISED AFTER NINE GAMES ::  $1543.63
If you’re interested in joining the fight and have a fun pledge you want to share with The Production Line, Herm 2 Hockeytown, and Children’s Hospital, please let me know in the comments or via e-mail. Check out the TPL post introducing the fun times and check out everyone’s pledges! If you’re on this list and don’t have a calculator handy — no worries. I’m keeping tabs on every single goal via a massive spreadsheet and will e-mail or Direct Message you your total at the end of the 11 games. 
TPL’S TAKE
Oh good, another early goal against. Fifty-something seconds into the game, Oiler We Covet Andrew Cogliano would open the scoring — followed four minutes later by Ryan Whitney’s first goal as an Oiler. Niklas Kronwall, Brad Stuart, and Henrik Zetterberg were all -2 by the 5:00 mark of the first period. Most of those five minutes were spent in the Wings zone. Honestly, I don’t remember the Red Wings crossing center ice until about halfway through the first period. I don’t follow the Oilers that closely, but I think it’s fair to say that this was the single best period of hockey in the history of the Oilers (Gretzky era included). 
It was revealed just after the intermission that Mike Babcock didn’t say a word — or even look at his players — when he called timeout after the second goal. Ken Daniels said it was completely silent. Somehow I doubt the locker room was silent…
Patrick Eaves went down and was slow getting up early in the second period. He didn’t seem to miss a shift, and he converted a wicked passed from Draper below the goal line to cut the lead to one. However, as the third period began, the Wings were down a body on the bench, and we were informed that Eaves would not return with an “upper body injury.” No word yet on his status for Vancouver on Saturday. 
With Jimmy pulled, the Wings finally felt the urgency. It didn’t look good, and the crowd was cheering as the Oilers were doing their best to fall on the puck in the corners. It squeaked loose, and Brian Rafalski got the puck through the crease with just under a second to go and BOOM! FACE-HUMPED, ALBERTA. With 0.3 seconds on the clock, the Wings tied it up, and we’re heading to overtime.
After that, it was pretty much exactly how you think it’d go: a limp overtime, and a shitty shootout. Jimmy Howard is pretty weak in the skills competition, as are the Wings shooters. Datsyuk and Flip were denied, but Jason Williams had a nifty one in between them. Didn’t matter, however. Ballgame. 
You know… all of these damn games would stop being so friggin’ important if ANY team we needed to win EVER did. It seems like every time someone can help us out (COUGH, Eastern Conference or the Sharks), they shit the bed, forcing the Wings to do it all themselves. Simple odds would point to this, too, being a curse of the Malocchio. San Jose lost, meaning Calgary has 81 points on the season…which is the same total the Wings have now. 
RE-VISITING THE PRE-GAME QUICK THOUGHTS
1. The Wings played exactly like a team on vacation for the first 59 minutes and 59 seconds. 
2. I didn’t notice Ericsson once, but he wasn’t on the ice for either Oilers goal, so I guess that’s something. For the record, the last three Wings losses are the only three games Ericsson has played in. Chew on that for a minute.
3. The big Wings weren’t very big tonight. Datsyuk was dangling, but had a grand total of zero shots. Zetterberg continues to wobble his way through the season. Johan Franzen seemed to get his puck on the stick a lot, but nothing came of any of it.
4. The Oilers looked like a team that is dealing with a lot of injuries — and they are. But they outplayed the hell out of the Wings.
5. It’ll be interesting to see who gets the start in Vancouver, because Jimmy Howard is very clearly the guy — and the guy that Babcock’s said will be used when they need points. They need points, but no one would be shocked to see Chris Osgood in net.
WHAT’S NEXT?
Back-to-back. Vancouver Canucks. Saturday night.

I NEARLY FORGOT…
Here ya go, Hockeytown. Blame Serven for reminding me Vanessa Hudgens existed. She’s Latin, so it counts (also, she’s 21, so it’s okay to oggle her now).