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Apr 7 :: Sounds like a damn monster movie…


Red Wings and Blue Jackets, 7:30pm, Wednesday, Detroit. The first of a home-and-home series spread out over three nights. 
Detroit lost control of their destiny by bed-shitting the weekend away, the Wings find themselves in 7th place in the Western Conference. All 8 teams are set, and the Wings will need some help to climb back into 6th – let alone 5th. 
5 :: Nashville :: 98 points (2 games left) [at Phoenix tonight, 10pm]
6 :: Los Angeles :: 97 points (3 games left)
7 :: Detroit :: 96 points (3 games left) [vs. Columbus tonight, 7:30pm]
8 :: Colorado :: 93 points (3 games left) [at Edmonton tonight, 9:30pm]
We totally just did this. On April Fools Day, the Wings defeated the Blowjays (hi Natalie) 3-2 in a game that featured the most glorious Todd Bertuzzi play of all time: the flying karate chop. Homeboy played a lot of Mortal Kombat back in the day. Which explains all the Fatality and Brutality. TOASTY!
I’m tired of this shit. Jason Williams blah blah blah, Sami Pahlsson yadda yadda yadda. 
–Chris Osgood lost to Philadelphia, 4-3, on Easter. 
–Columbus lost to St. Louis, 2-1, in overtime on Monday. I didn’t see the game, but I can assure you it was likely the best, most exciting hockey game in over a decade.
–Detroit Red Wings :: 41-24-14 (3rd in Central, 7th in West) :: 24-10-6 at home.
–Nashville Predators :: 32-34-14 (5th in Central, 14th in West) :: 12-22-6 on the road.
Coat :: Blazer :: Windbreaker :: Peacoat :: Jerkin :: Flak :: Straight :: Smoking
Franzen — Datsyuk — Holmstrom
Bertuzzi — Zetterberg — Filppula
Eaves — Helm — Loins
Miller — Draper — Williams
Lidstrom — Rafalski
Kronwall — Stuart
Ericsson — Lilja
Howard (starting)
As promised, Rocky-themed Nicknames, with the aid of Mr. Herm:
Brett “Just Wanna Let You Know I Am Very Available” Lebda
Derek “Yeah, Yeah, I Mean Business Too” Meech
Kirk “Down! Down! Stay Down!” Maltby
Honorable Mentions
Henrik “Women Weaken Legs” Zetterberg
Pavel “Not Worth Braggin About” Datsyuk
Jason “Forget About Sports as a Profession” Williams
Darren “Eat Lightning and Crap Thunder” Helm
Brad “The Truck That Run Over Your Face” Stuart
Mike “Let Me Do The Figurin'” Babcock
Ken “Cut Me Mick” Daniels
Chris “It Ain’t Over til It’s Over” Chelios
Brad “You Ain’t So Bad” May
Krys “No Rematch” Barch
Todd’s Corner
Todd “Screw You Creepo” Bertuzzi
Todd “Maybe I Like Garbage” Bertuzzi
Todd “Kentucky Fried Idiot” Bertuzzi
Todd “I Want You Outta Here Instamatically” Bertuzzi
1. The weekend threw the breaks onto an impressive winning streak that propelled the Wings into playoff safety. Now that they’re officially there, will they play for a higher seed, or will they settle in a bit and try to click as a unit? I think this game goes a long way in determining their mentality – and whether or not they care who they’ll play in the first round.
2. The top six will need to continue to be the top six, even though we all expect them to get a little bit of a breather: if not with healthy scratches, at least with decreased ice time. Red Wings Masterton nominee Tomas Holmstrom’s back could use a day or two to prepare for even more cross-checks in the post-season.
3. Speaking of rest, do you think Nick Lidstrom takes a break? He’s one of the three guys that have played in all 79 games so far (Brad Stuart and SheTuzzi are the others), and could certainly use a breather heading into the grind. Unless he doesn’t like to roll like that. In which case, I say cyborg on.
4. If you missed the 14th episode of The Obstructed View, go now. Make sure you check out the post and make your guess as to what Tyler said that was beeped. 
WHAT WE LEARNED vs. the Flyers
Seventeen seconds: a new personal best.

11 thoughts on “Apr 7 :: Sounds like a damn monster movie…”

  1. The Rocky nicknames are all I could have ever hoped for…and more. My faves are Ken Daniels and every single Bert one. Holy hell.

  2. Speaking of great games, check out Tampa/Carolina from last night. Its sad to see players like Lecavalier and Stamkos being wasted in the orange state. I wonder how many people outside of Tampa know he has 47 goals on the year.

    Anyways, wings SHOULD handle the BJs easily, hopefully with another good performance from cleary in extended playing time

  3. Ken "Cut me, Mick" Daniels easy favorite out of another good group.

    I like the idea of resting Nick for tonight and Friday and then running him out there against the Blackhawks. I don't know how likely it is that we face them in the first round, but if it happens, I'd like to give them a nice kick in the dick to end the regular season on and the opportunity to think about what happened for a few days.

    You know, psych 'em out an' shit.

  4. Kron, you write 'em, I'll publish 'em. All I know about The Cure is that "they exist."

    Natalie, I feel like a Rocky-inspired dance is on the table for Brian at H2H2. Perhaps on stairs somewhere. While yelling your name.

    Adam, I saw the score of that game while I was flipping through Center Ice last night. Saw it was two teams I couldn't give less of a shit about and kept going, but not before catching a glimpse at the score. It actually caused me to go "wait, what" out loud and flip back to see if I saw it wrong…

    JJ, Ken's seemed natural. I also like the idea of resting folks, but Nick's never been one to take time off before — I have to assume, at this point, it's personal preference to play.

    Spout, good find. I saw that he was in tonight (hence he lineup), but hadn't seen that quote about preferring to play 'em out. CYBORG ON, indeed!

  5. Loved the "Screw you creepo"

    Under memba me, I first read "I'm too old for this shit" and I am sorry, but that would have been better.

  6. I'm reserving "I'm too old for this shit" for Lethal Weapon nickname day.

    And it will be Chris Chelios'.

  7. oooh…lethal weapon nickname day!?!? be chicago, so we have tomas "guy wanted to jump, he jumped…you wanted him down, he's down" kopecker!!
    or would that be better for huet? and who gets to be the brown roast-like substance?
    probably coach q. i actually was having a wonderful non-jail-sex dream the other night, when oddly i heard someone in the background mention coach q, and left my sex to scream "coach q sucks kane, and gives him 2 dimes for the privelage, cause coach bab's owns his p*ssy!!"
    dreams are frakkin' weird, eh?

  8. Guilherme Calciolari

    I'm so happy you stayed away from that aberration that is Rocky V.

    But where the hell is Darren Drago?

  9. lethal weapon nickname day is gonna be the second most hardcore ever (assuming you will have a Die Hard day)

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