Forget Little Big League, I want the kid from Little Giants.

You think there’s a way to make “The Annexation of Puerto Rico” a hockey play?

I wish we weren’t kidding. I’d KILL to have a guy like Darren Helm but the heart and soul of the team. But seeing them interact, he’s very much an “outskirts” guy. 

Smith, on the other hand, seems to be very outspoken and personable and not afraid to say “what the fuck is wrong with you assholes?” Maybe a few years away (obviously) but might have that kind of pedigree.

Not at all a bad suggestion and I hope I didn’t piss all over the fire. HA!

maybe they can bring in that kid from Little Big League to show them how fun the game is again by playing pranks and using trick plays.  If that fails to win games they will at least learn some life lessons.

Well..err…umm…I was totally kidding.  Let’s just make Smith the captain.

Having spent 48 short hours with the team last season, I will confirm that there is no way in hell that Darren Helm will be the guy to stand up and say something. And if he did, he would likely be laughed at by the other 22 guys in the room. The ONLY thing he has in common with Drapes is the situational plays he’s entrusted with, sadly. 

I’d love for him to be a leader in that way, but he’s extremely timid and keeps very much to himself. 

Why not Darren Helm?  Yeah he’s young and he’s not a top line goal scorer, but the kid works his tail off and  excels at his role.  He’s like a young Draper.  He appears to be liked by his teammates.  He’s always giving it his all shift after shift.  I don’t see why he wouldn’t be respected in that dressing room if he stood up and tried to light a fire under some of his teammates’ asses.  

It’s crazy talk, but I still think Hudler should pull it.  I’m pretty sure there’s still some leftover bitterness in the locker room regarding his defection and I’ve read plenty of little hints and whatnots that the guy’s kind of an unlikable douchebuster in real life, but I think if the midget pimp stands up in the locker room and says “I have as many points as you, Zetterberg, so I’ve got just as much right to talk as you do.” and then lays into them about if they’ve all got a problem then they can shove it up their ugly asses and that he didn’t learn his lesson about hard work and dedication to watch an entire dressing room full of the same kind of shit he got crucified for last year go on this season.  Worst case is that he makes himself a locker room cancer and gets shipped out in a contract year; if that happens, then that little rat is better off for leaving the sinking ship anyway.

Of course, that’s all part of my rock n’ roll fantasy.  I don’t know who is going to stand up in that locker room and grab the fiery reins that got taken out of Draper’s hands.  There are a ton of good candidates and, as you’ve said, four of those assholes already have letters on the front of their jerseys so that’s kind of their fucking job.

I still maintain that Babcock has some accountability here too, but really, there’s enough to go around.

At this point, I don’t give a shit who steps up. Babcock, Lidstrom, Zetterberg, Helm, Paul Boyer, the usher in section 118. Just turn it around and start winning some games.

I agree with the Datsyuk sentiment and I really thought about leaving him out of this. But at the end of the day, he’s got the letter too, so he deserved to be a part. I appreciate that he’s at least acknowledging the fact that he’s sucking right now, but unfortunately that’s the only place he’s really seen as a leader: on the ice. So until the results come, he’s just as accountable as everyone else.

That said, his teammates need to make it a priority to get him going, and nobody seems wiling to do so. They looked up to the task in the first last night, and Datsyuk got himself in good positions to make something happen and I felt like it was just a matter of time before he tallied. But then the wheels fell off and it was Datsyuk dangling on an island with no help. That’s where his teammates need to light some asses on fire and show some urgency. It’s just a fucking shame to watch.